Ok but actually, this whole idea around feeding a baby has just gone crazy! Today I received my Haaka pump, I was literally so excited I almost greeted the courier with my boobs not quite in my bra yet....almost
So like all mum bloggers I thought I had better share my "breast feeding journey." Gosh, I really do hate that term. So to start with let's get one thing clear- I do not enjoy breast feeding. Like at all. I've read all these blogs about feeling like a life giving goddess, that amazing bond and all that, and yeah I totally get that life giving nutrients are literally flowing from you. But when I think of breast feeding all I think about is that time we took the kids to the Rotorua A & P Show and we walked into the milking shed. Hours on end, my full time job is to sit on my bottom and feed this beautiful precious child. That is my main function in life, as a breast feeding mum, just like a dairy cow.
Let's get one thing straight, breast feeding was not difficult at all with Shyra-Beth. I was incredibly confused at the start because each different midwife I had at the hospital told me something different, but once my midwife who was also a lactation consultant came in and gave me direct step by step instructions we were off and away. I fed Shyra-Beth right up till a few weeks after her first birthday and then she discovered Anchor Silver Top and fell head over heels in love. In fact I remember the last time I breastfed. Josiah was at his soccer final and I was sitting on the couch watching Grey's Anatomy. It hit me, this is probably the last time I am going to breastfeed this child. There I sat waiting for it, sadness? remorse?... nada! Like actually if anything, if I'm being perfectly honest there might have been a hint a relief.
Does that make me a horrible person? I've had friends who have had the works! Sore, cracked nips, intense pain. Here I was having no breast feeding consequences other than dire boredom and raging hormones (not in a good way at all) and I really disliked doing it. Am I allowed to say that? In a culture where breast is best is so glorified, am I able to express my feelings around this issue?
Jeremy has been a whole different story. From day one I noticed his latch was different but as he was piling on the weight in start, it didn't really worry me. It wasn't until after we were discharged by the midwife that he started dropping percentiles. By 3 months, he was feeding all the time, but had dropped two weight percentiles and gone up 2 height percentiles. Shyra-Beth did the same thing around the same age so we weren't too worried, until I started connecting dots. My nips were always sore, I wasn't hormonal, I had never needed a breast pad even when we started doing long stretches at night and when i pumped for a friend I got next to nothing. My mum-tuition started kicking in so I took him to the doctors. Two doctors and a nurse who was a former midwife looked at him and said nothing was wrong. But mummy always knows best. One appointment with the lactation consultant and less than a week later Jeremy was getting his Grade 2, lip and tongue tie lasered! Yay for our first pain free feed! Featured below
Two months later, this boy is feeding heaps better, my supply is up but he is still not putting on enough weight! He does long stretches at night but feeds quite a bit during the day. We have just started solids and plunket has recommended I start expressing as well.
Ahhh expressing the joy of my life. Actually no, I dislike it more than breastfeeding. The buzz of the pump, the looking at cute baby videos to stimulate oxytocin, the fact that you literally just have to sit there and do nothing apart from maybe watch TV or read a book. The only time of day I can sit and do nothing is when both my babies are asleep and during those moments the last thing I want to do is sit there and feel like a glorified milking cow! This is where the Haaka Pump comes in!
You attach it and that is it, completely hands free! This morning I had it attached while I helped Shyra-Beth with breakfast and TA DA, 50ml of milk. 50ml of milk would normally take me 20-30 minutes of sitting down and expressing with my electric pump. My most intense let down is first thing in the morning after JJ sleeps 9pm-7am (Yes I know, he is amazing) So I have my wee Haaka pump chilling on my bedside table waiting to be attached first thing tomorrow morning!
So I fully don't know if anyone actually reads these, or I'm just ranting away to myself. But if you are...There's such a mum-culture about giving baby the absolute best everything. For goodness sake we have a $800 pram! That's more expensive that most first cars! I guess the moral of my story is give baby the best that you can. That may be breast milk or it may be formula. You give baby what is best for baby, even if it comes as a sacrifice to you. But don't mistake the fine line between sacrifice and suffering. You can't give baby your best if you are suffering, and if breast feeding is causing you to suffer, it's not worth it. If like me, breast feeding is just annoying, do it, make the sacrifice, your babe will thank you for it!
That's my 2 cents for today! But seriously if you are a breast feeding mumma Haaka have their original pumps on special for only $20! It really is a must have!
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